I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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