I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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