"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
