Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize