West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
