she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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