I'm going to jail i love you
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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