JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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