You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
