can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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