Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
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