I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Randomize