I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
