They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
