Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
