The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
it was like eating out sand paper
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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