they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize