I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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