fuck your aforementioned shoe
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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