whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize