my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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