You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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