hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
