Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
