David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
im about as happy as oj after his trial
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
