thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
There's always time for handjobs
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
