I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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