she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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