You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
