at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
