people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
