ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
