On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Randomize
