I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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