I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Semen is not good for contacts.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Randomize
