we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize