Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
