why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
