And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
