hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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