i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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