this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
