PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
