the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
he fucked my hip out of place.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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