bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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