If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize