Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
