So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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