Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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