Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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